Family, friends & emergency planning
Sharing the weight, and being prepared.
Family and friend's support
It is normal if you do not view yourself as a carer but instead view the care you provide as part of your relationship. It is also normal to feel that identifying as a carer depersonalises your relationship or creates a false impression that you do not want to provide care. Sharing responsibilities through a family and friend-based approach, promotes improved wellbeing for everyone involved.
It is recognised that relational factors are also centred on family dynamics, with any family conflicts having a negative effect on living grief. If possible, prioritise responsibility of care needs together and with agreement to open communication. Sharing responsibility doesn’t always mean sharing ‘hands-on’ care.
Identifying ‘micro-support’ can also be helpful for things like food shopping, picking up prescriptions, running errands or ad hoc tasks. Someone may simply offer to check in with you every few days to see how you are. This support can be invaluable logistical or emotional support and should be viewed positively. Micro-support’ helps prevent lots of small tasks from piling up and creating overwhelm. It is equally ok to simply want a few hours break. There is no need to justify this or feel guilty or worried about being judged by others.
“Asking for help and support is a strength” - Carer
Having a voice without fear or guilt, both now and in the future, will encourage a more open conversation about dementia with those around you. As you progress through your journey, small incremental shifts in support will feel easier to ask for and accept and maintain a consistent level of help around you.
EXAMPLES OF MICRO-SUPPORT
Can you collect some food shopping? I have a list.
Could you come to the house for a couple of hours on Friday so I can go out?
There’s a prescription to be collected from the pharmacy; can you pick it up?
There’s a pile of ironing; can you help?
Starting the conversation
Often family and friends want to help but are afraid to overstep or feel like they can’t offer enough. Identifying your needs and that of the person you care for is a great first step. Be specific about what you need, review often, and state the difference it will make.
Even if someone cannot fulfil a specific ask, you can ask what else they can do.
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Some specific things you might ask include:
Can you collect some food shopping? I have a list.
Could you come to the house for a couple of hours on Friday so I can go out?
There’s a prescription to be collected from the pharmacy; can you pick it up?
There’s a pile of ironing; can you help?
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Getting started is simple. Reach out through our contact form or schedule a call—we’ll walk you through the next steps and answer any questions along the way.
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We combine a thoughtful, human-centered approach with clear communication and reliable results. It’s not just what we do—it’s how we do it that sets us apart.
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You can reach us anytime via our contact page or email. We aim to respond quickly—usually within one business day.
Emergency planning
Having a good emergency plan in place ensures the person you care for is safe if you are suddenly unavailable due to illness, accident, or another unforeseen event. There are some keys things you can do to plan:
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Keep a list of at least two people who can help at short notice. Note them as emergency contacts in your phone and keep their name, number and relation to you in a visible and prominent place.
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Create a digital or physical folder (or both) containing current medication and dosages, GP details and any other healthcare professional, and daily routines and support that’s required.
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Ensure a trusted neighbour or family member has a spare key or knows the code to a key safe.
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Carry a card that identifies you as a carer. It should state “I have someone at home depending on me for care. In an emergency, please call [name] on [number].
Need help thinking it through?
CoWL's MIST team can help you build your plan.